Pardon Me: The Simple Woman's Daybook

If you would like to join in and post your own Daybook, please head on over to visit Peggy at The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today:  Sunday, June 19, 2016
 

Outside my window …  Partly cloudy with temperatures in the mid 80's.  It's a perfect day for a walk or ride, and I'm in bed feeling achy and down.  I've got to break out of this somehow.  It's going to get too hot to play outside again soon.

I am thinking...   about today's sermon.  Pastor Staples taught on forgiveness.  I'll be the first to admit that part of my depressive state comes from fighting bitterness of heart.  Forgiveness of others is something I strive for.  But forgiveness of self?  I once saw an article that said that forgiving oneself wasn't a biblical concept.  How so?  If God took the time to put in His Word more than once that we should "love your neighbor as yourself," why would forgiveness not be a part of that love?   The question for me is how?  I've not seen anything on the subject other than "just do it."  Sorry, but this isn't a Nike commercial. 

I am thankful...  for this respite from the hot humid weather.

From the Workshop...  My goal this week is to finish up a quilt-ghan I've been working on for a while.  Also finished up a project on my 101 in 1001 list. Read about it on my sister blog here.

I am reading...  I finished My Daddy Was a Pistol and I'm a Son of a Gun by Lewis Grizzard.  The review is here.  Along with working on unfinished selections I started the beginning of the year, I'm now in the book of Job in my read through the Bible.

I am learning...  I've had a "God breeze" this week.  After all this time, I finally understand what people mean when they say that I need to make things happen.  I though they meant that I literally had to MAKE something happen.  I'm not God (and that's a good thing--I'd have gone Old Testament on a bunch of people).  What they mean is that I need to be more proactive than reactive.  Why they didn't simply SAY that I don't know.  Now, I looking for ways to be more proactive.  The biggest challenge is my eating; it is still very reactive.  I've got to get more control.

 

I've also got to learn how to relax.  Those I trust tell me that I'm too hard on myself and I need to learn to be gentle with myself.  Wait, I thought since I was still fat that  I wasn't hard enough on myself.  But seriously, where has all this mental punishment gotten me?

Favorite quote(s) of the week: 

 

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

 

Marrian Williamson

 

I am looking forward to...  trying again.

And now for something totally different...

 

Workout of the Week:  Last Saturday I tried my first yoga class.  I've been quite leery of yoga, but tried it anyway.  Everything that bothered me about it happened during class--the chanting, the meditations, the finding my chakra.  I was hoping the class wouldn't have all that.  I know that some people can simply do the stretches and ignore the rest.  I can't.  I purposely set out to think about Bible passages as we did the movements.  It was like hitting a spiritual brick wall.  Over a year ago, my friend Jhona gave me a DVD called Praise Moves.  It's yoga poses, but the meditations are on Scripture and the focus is on Christ.  I've watched it, but never did it.  Maybe this will fit the bill.

 

Five Minute Friday Word of the Week: Lose.  I knew it would take me into a dark place, so I abstained from participating in the blog.

See y'all next time.

#13: Load Up the Bases [101 in 1001]

Load up the bases, fire up the crowd.

Lets clear out the dugout, we're gonna get real loud!

Just throw me a fastball, smoke from the mound.

We're gonna end this thing with just one swing.

I'm gonna knock one out!

I'm gonna knock one out!

Load Up the Bases by Whiskey Falls

　
My earliest TV memories were of Sesame Street, Hee-Haw, and later when we got cable, televised Major League baseball games. My dad and I didn’t have many common interests, but we did have a mutual love/hate relationship with the Atlanta Braves. We watched them go from worst to first, and unfortunately by the time my father died, back to worst again. Dad’s been gone for twelve years and they haven’t made it back to first YET! *sigh*

One of my dreams was to attend a game.  The problem was 1) I don't drive on the interstate, 2) Even if I did, there's no way I'm driving in Atlanta (much less alone), and 3) I don't even know how to buy a proper affordable ticket without ending up with seats just outside the toilet.  I put it on my 101 in 1001 list, not really knowing if it was possible.

I heard a minister say once that there was no Hebrew word for "coincidence"--meaning "A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps (Proverbs 16:9 KJV).  No, I'm not saying that Baseball is the Lord's favorite sport (we all know it's college football).  I simply mean that God does care about the little things.  So I won't say it was a coincidence, but that God lined things up perfectly.  My friend Joni is an avid Braves and San Francisco Giants fan (?).  She happened to mention to me at church that the Braves and Giants were playing each other in Atlanta on Memorial Day--my 44th birthday AND my day off--and she and her family were planning to attend.  I asked her if there was any way possible for me to ride with them, plus I needed help buying a ticket.  "No problem," she said.

No problem?

Wait, where are all the excuses I usually get from my friends when it comes to stuff like this?

There weren't any.

The night before the game and the ride to Atlanta were reminiscent of the sleepless nights and giddy mornings I experience before a 5k race.  Walking from the Blue parking lot to our seats was like walking a 5k.  I didn't care.  I was at Turner Field during it's last season (they're building a new stadium, SunTrust Field). 

The seats were great.  They were in the shade and on the upper deck of the home plate side.  The pre-game festivities were a moving tribute to the military heroes we lost in combat.  The game was fabulous; the Braves actually defeated the Giants 5-3.  (Do the Chop here)  The only downside was the roasted peanuts; the bag I bought must have been old...very old.

I came home tired, but with a smile on my face. Thanks, Joni, for giving me one of the best birthdays ever!

#39: Spirit of the Bull [101 in 1001]

Back in 2013, I blogged about my time with the Jacksonville State University Marching Southerners, my college marching band.  I'll not rehash the sordid details here (that's what the link is for), but I did end the post by saying that I wanted emotional closure.

I think I found it on November 21, 2015.

Like every alumnus, I get a yearly invitation to our reunion.  Each time I'd plan to go, turn chicken (no pun intended), and find a reason not to go.  This time, I felt I was mentally ready and sent in my RSVP without hesitation.

Note:  I said mentally ready.  I wasn't sure I was physically ready.  Now, mind you, this isn't a sit around, drink beer, and reminisce kind of reunion...well, maybe they do that at the Friday night dinner, but I wasn't  around for that (I am on a budget, you know).  No, we're there to play during halftime.  I had to be prepared to play anything from triangle to bass drum.  Well, I WAS lighter than my college weight, so why not?

Parking was an issue when I got there Saturday morning.  There was a price for the closest spaces, plus I found out later if you left and came back, you'd be charged again, plus you may not get your spot back.  So, I did what any cheapskate would do, I parked at the Library for free and walked across campus.  That proved to be a good decision.  As I traversed the Quad and got closer to the sound of the current members warming up, any fear I may have had gave way to absolute giddy excitement. 

Upon arrival at Burgess-Snow Field, I was met by the group from the Grey Drummers--alumni from the percussion  section.  They meet during the year to play.  They welcomed me as an equal and handed me a set of 18 inch cymbals to play.  Hot diggidy, it's on now!

Practice went well.  Halftime went even better.  Not only did we play the Southerners standards, but performed one of my all time favorites, Spirit of the Bull, with the current band.  By the time we were done, I thought my arms were going to fall off, but I was ecstatic.  I can't wait the 2016 reunion.

Why hadn't I done this before?

For starters because I hadn't dealt with my bad memories.  In fact, I had suppressed them for nearly two decades.  Then, there's the whole "I gotta lose X-amount of pounds so I can feel worthy to come back."  You know what?  I wasn't at my goal weight and I didn't care!  If "Mr. Coordinator" who body shamed me was there, I never noticed, and I wasn't looking for him either. I was having too much fun crashing plates.  If he had made his presence known to me, I wouldn't have hesitated to show him genuine fellowship and courtesy. 

If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed. - John 8:36

I thank God for freeing me from the pain, helping me find equality, and renewing a long stifled joy.

Blow Southerners!

See You Next Year: The Weekly Hodgepodge

Want to join the party?  Go on over to From This Side of the Pond  for the Hodgepodge link-up!

Share a favorite memory/moment from the week of Christmas.

Christmas week started out very sadly.  My oldest brother, Melvin, passed away and we had his funeral on the 21st.  It wasn't all grieving and sadness though. 

One of the items on my 101 in 1001 list was to be a secret sister/pal for someone for a year.  This was something we did ages ago at my home church and I felt God wanted me to do this for someone at my new church.  Christmas day I revealed my identity to her.  We both enjoyed this year of secrets.  It was fun for her trying to find out who it was and fun for me trying not to give myself away.  That, our beautiful Christmas Eve service, and spending time with a couple of my nieces' and their kids were the highlight of my week.

If someone wrote a book about your life based on the past year, what genre would it fall under? What would the title be?

A horror novel called Aw, Hell Naw! by Steve Harvey.

It would be funny if it weren't so true.  This year was better than last year, but it still been a rough one. 

What made you feel patriotic this year?

Playing patriotic tunes with the Community Band at the Memorial Day weekend concert at the Community Center. 

What experience from this past year would you like to do all over again?

Riding the entire Ladiga Trail on my birthday.  I may do it again for my next birthday.

What song lyric sums up or is a reflection of your 2015?

I'm through with you.  I don't want to be your just for fun.  Don't want to be under your thumb.  All I want to be is DONE.

On a scale of 1-10 how would you rate 2015?  (10=stellar) Why?

I'd give it a 5.  Like I said, it was rough. 

What part of the upcoming year are you most excited about?

Trying again to get it right.  Hopefully new possibilities and opportunities.

Insert your own random thought here.

Happy new year, y'all.

#29: 33for43 [101 in 1001]

Click here for more info on 101 in 1001.

Photos courtesy of Eric Dryden, Carmine DiBiase, Leah Mumpower, and me.  (They will be paid in Christmas cookies).

One of the best things about my county is the Chief Ladiga Trail.  Named after Muscogee Indian Chief Ladiga, the trail is an asphalt paved, 33-mile stretch of glorious Southern scenery.  Once part of the Southern Railway system, this byway is used for walks, runs, and rides of all types of non-motorized conveyances.

The Challenge

I've been walking/running and cycling parts of the trail for a couple of years but never experienced it in its entirety.  I'd hinted at riding the whole trail "sometime."  My training rides were a safe drop in the bucket that didn't challenge me enough to even consider being able to ride 33 miles.  Workout partners came and went.  The challenge seemed insurmountable.  And then, of course, was the repeated protest shouted in my mind, "You're too fat to do that!"

Ready, Set, Party!



Let's get this party started!

A few weeks before I left for the Journey Training (I refer to it in this post), I'd decided I would try it.  I'd have someone drop me off at the trailhead, I'd ride as far as I could, and my ride would pick me up at the end (or wherever I stopped).  My walking buddy, Leah, was all for it.  OK, that's safe enough.

Well, in comes the Journey Training, and I am messed up!  After all the changes I went through (and will go through at the completion of the training in June) I came away more bold than I'd been in a long time.  When I got home, I firmly committed to not only make the attempt, but to use the ride to celebrate my 43rd birthday.  Yes, I was actually going to TELL people what I was doing and celebrate it, even it I had to ride alone. 

I got up on the morning of the 30th feeling excited, but nervous as a cat in room full of rocking chairs. You know, that nervous gotta pee feeling.  Finding the trail was easy enough, but figuring out the correct riding direction wasn't so clear cut.  The "parking" area is a little piece from the official entrance, so we had to walk to the entrance arch to figure where to go.



Lovely entrance.  Too bad the welcome sign is all jacked up.

 

Leah shot a couple of pictures, we prayed, and I took off.  Equipped with my cell phone, camera, drinks, food, a change of clothes, and pepper spray, I thought What have I gotten myself into?  As I flew through the first few miles, my nerves faded and my confidence grew.  Then it happened.  Around mile marker 4 or 5, a friend joined in.  Hallelujah!  I'm not alone.  Eric, who knows every nook and cranny of  Chief Ladiga and Silver Comet trails, became my tour guide and photographer.  I would have enjoyed just the camaraderie of the ride, but he made sure I didn't miss anything.

 

 

 

Around mile marker 10, Susan joined in.

 

 

From there, we had great fun chatting on the way to our next stop at the welcome center in Piedmont, AL (mile marker 14).  I will definitely visit here again.

 

 

After a snack and potty break, we said goodbye to Susan and headed out again...oh wait, another cool spot in the area is Piedmont Springs.  We took a detour there for a few minutes.

 

 

 

The Wall

 

Just before we got to Jacksonville, the party on wheels kicked it up a notch.  My Anniston Runner's Club and Journey Training buddy, Carla and Susan's husband, Carmine joined in.  We pedaled, and laughed, and pedaled some more.  It really was a party on wheels.  We talked about a lot of everything and a lot of nothing.  We had no idea that a surprise was waiting for us at the rock wall past the turtle pond (mile marker 22). 

 

 

My friends (and Worship Pastors) Bob and Angie met our party with encouragement, hugs, laughs, and cold water.  This was so sweet.  Thanks for the love, y'all!

 

 

From Left to right:  Eric, Carla, Angie, Bob, me, Carmine.

 

 

At Germania Springs Park, we met up with Leah (my walking buddy and partner in this mess) for a quick hug and photos... and for her to see that I wasn't dead. (mile marker 24)

 

 

 

 

We headed on into town, said goodbye to Eric, and took our lunch break at the train depot.  After 26 miles, I was so sweaty and icky.  I changed clothes, said goodbye to Carla, and Carmine and I headed to finish this thing.

 

The Other Wall

 

I've heard my fellow runners and cyclists talking about hitting the wall or bonking.  I've only had a similar experience on runs where I was too ill to be running or on bike rides when mechanical problems forced me to get off and push.  This is the first time in the ride that I actually thought I wouldn't finish.  Thinking that I would probably bonk at mile marker 31 (the inclined section of Weaver that satan built), I figured I'd be fine on the portion from the depot to that spot .  Ha!  Right at the welcome sign at Weaver I had to get off and have a moment.

 

 

 

I was gasping for breath like I'd chain smoked six packs of Camel cigarettes straight, my heart was playing the Spider drum cadence in my chest, and the back of my head and neck hurt like I'd be hit with and aluminum folding chair at a rasslin' match.  What the hay?!  Three miles left and I'm falling apart?  Get it together, woman!  Praise the Lord, no vomit was involved.  Thankful for Carmine's patience, I drank water and Gatorade, stretched my neck, blew my nose, and hopped back on the bike.  My goal was to not get off again until I completed the ride. 

 

 

 

Tired, hungry, and in need of a four hour shower and a 100-count bottle of Ibuprofen, I'd DONE IT!  I finished all 33 miles.  Carmine honored me; he who cycles like a mad man and finished the Cheaha Challenge, said he was proud of me.  I know you're not supposed to say this, but quite frankly I was very proud of me.  This is what we call at the Journey Training a CHAMPION MOMENT.

 

 

 

So, am I done with cycling?  Absolutely NOT!  All this does is make me hungry to ride more (after a little break, of course).  Who knows?  Soon you may see pictures from parts of the Silver Comet Trail.  Stay tuned.

#84: Y'all Eat Yet? [A-Z Blog Challenge 2015]

Welcome to the 2015 A to Z Blog Challenge.  After participating last year, I planned to join everyone is April, but I just couldn't think of any ideas...until now.

Last year, I blogged about some of my recovery/fitness heroes and inspirations.  This year, I thought I would focus on food...

Well, I was going to print the words to Food Glorious Food here but had no idea that it was actually malnourished children singing it in the play Oliver.  So, I thought better of it.  Yeah, I need to read Oliver Twist.  Anyway...

One of my big issues with food is that I never seem to enjoy eating.  Every meal, whether it was nutritious or not, left me with a strong sense of guilt, shame or emptiness.  I'd grown to hate eating because there was no joy in it.  Also, I'm willing to admit that I'm not that great of a cook.  I'm hoping this challenge will change that.

I'm calling this challenge "Experiments From Auntie's Test Kitchen."  Like America's Test Kitchen, I may try something brand new or put a twist on an old standard.  Unlike them, I'm using everyday kitchen stuff and freely admit that I don't know what I'm doing, and I'm not standing around like Christopher Kimball, the bowtie wearing "host" who always looks like he's just smelled a fart.

Aw crap!  Who farted?

Each letter may represent a food I'm using, a technique, or maybe something I've learned about food.  I make no guarantees that this challenge will only take a month, nor can I say that I'll just blog on certain days.  I take a letter as it comes.  If a letter falls on my Daybook or Hodgepodge days, I may simply include them with that day's entry. 

I started not to participate because I'm not a big fan of people sharing pictures of food on social media ad nauseam  (thank the Lord I'm not on Instagram; my head would explode).  However, you have a choice as to whether to read or not...and please do and enjoy.

Start here with letter A.

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 12 [101 in 1001]



Book: The Purpose Driven Life.

Author: Rick Warren

Info: Copyright 2002 by Zondervan

Where acquired: Acquired from a friend.

Why:  I have attempted to read through this devotional several times, but never finished.  I decided to use the last 40 days of this year as a challenge to read the whole thing. Maybe it will help me better prepare for the new year.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # #

What it's about:  We've all asked the question "Why am I here?" and wondered if our lives serve and real purpose.  Warren takes the reader on a 40 day journey to find life's true purpose.

Favorite Quotes: 

"Because God is love, the most important lesson he wants you to learn  on earth is how to love.  It is in loving that we are most like him..." - p. 123

"Many who claim to believe the Bible 'from cover to cover' have never read it from cover to cover." - p. 188

"Whenever you feel apathetic about your mission to the world, spend time thinking about what Jesus did for you on the cross."  p. 294

What I Liked:

• The daily reading/devotional format appeals to me.  That way I can take in the information in small doses and have time to think about it.
• The questions at the end of the chapters and in the appendix were great to help me focus.  I'm hoping that someone will want to do this as a group study and these questions would be great discussion starters.

What I didn’t like: 

• The book used a lot of end notes.  I'm used to authors citing Bible references within the text or using footnotes.  Having to flip back and forth for references was annoying.  It wasn't a deal breaker, just annoying.
• I didn't agree with some of the concepts in the book.  But, I guess the day I agree with everything someone writes is the day I stop thinking for myself--which won't happen.

To sum up: 

Although this book was a frustrating journey for me, I would highly recommend it to anyone.  Even the strongest of us struggle with identity sometimes.  This book is a great help in dealing with that struggle.

This review concludes the Jon Acuff Empty Shelf Challenge.  Hop on over to join my Auntie's Full Shelf Challenge.

#99 - 40 Days of Gratitude: Day 39 [101 in 1001]

This was my first year as a member of the Anniston Runners Club (ARC).  One of the benefits of the club is a reward system for certain mileage milestones.  Mile-a-day, or MAD is, of course, as the name indicates, completing one mile a day.  Two-a-day rewards for averaging two miles a day.  The ultimate is the 1200 club.  One earns an ARC jacket for completing an average of 100 miles a month for a year.

My first month was pretty good, I finished 29 miles.  OK it's a mile or two short, but I can make that up.  Not quite.  Spring and summer proved to be hard seasons for fitness.  I fought illness off and on for months and mileage was low.  My lowest was 13 miles in April.  By fall, I had a lot of catching up to do, but I did it!  October and November were my biggest months with 50 miles each.

Today, I finished miles 363, 364, and 365.  BOOYA!  Well, more like "owya!"  This wouldn't have been the day to complete this, but I wasn't going to risk not being able to get it done tomorrow.  We've had rainy, dreary, dreich  weather for days, and my joints have been screaming for clear weather. I don't have arthritis or anything, but the body can only take so much yucky, dark days.  These were three of the slowest miles I've done this year, but they are done. 

Thanks be to God for the strength to complete this challenge.  Thanks to Anniston Runners Club for the challenge.  Thanks to my friends for the encouragement.

Here's to an even better mileage new year in 2015!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 11 [101 in 1001]

Book: Front Porch Tales.

Author: Philip Gulley

Info: Copyright 1997 Multnoma Books

Where acquired: Checked out of public library.

Why:  Was browsing the library and saw the title.  My fondness for short stories drew me in.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # #  1/2

What it's about:  Gulley is a Quaker minister in Indiana.  He shares stories about life in his tight-knit community.  He mixes the practical with small doses of the spiritual.

Favorite Quotes: 

"The problem today is that too many folks know a lot about a thing or two, but not enough folks know a little about a lot of things.  If you don't believe that, just try to find a doctor who'll mend your feet and your nose in the same visit."  p. 26

"That's the kick about life.  We think we have it figured out, but then we wade in and discover otherwise.  Kind of like Gamer Pyle used to say, 'Surprise, surprise, surprise!'  All in all, that is a good thing.  For when our future is sure and certain, when all the corners are tucking in nice and neat, there is no need for faith." - pp. 84-85

"I have another cousin who has a doctorate.  He lives in Chicago and does research for a university.  He goes to South America a lot, but I'm not sure why.  Truthfully, I don't think he's a real doctor because when I asked him to play golf he didn't know how." p. 105

"I've formed a few insights into what constitutes the good life.  The first is this:  Never ask people how they're doing unless you really want to know.  The second is this:  Find a vocation that uses your God-given gifts, or you'll be a miserable wretch of a human being....There are a lot of things that can't be corrected.  Squandering your life in a job that shrivels your soul is one of them." - p. 129

What I Liked:

• The small town stories reminded me of the tales in Jan Karon's Mitford books.
• I like that the stories taught honest life lessons without out being too preachy.  Nothing against preachy, but too much of it comes off as forced and fake to the reader.
• When I only had a short time to read, it was great to be able to read a story in just a few minutes.

What I didn’t like: 

• Sometimes the author sounded more bitter and cynical than the sarcastic, snarky humor I'm used to.

To sum up:  My main takeaway from this book:  Small town life is not dead as long as I keep the small town attitude in my heart.

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 10 [101 in 1001]

Book: God is Not Mad at You.

Author: Joyce Meyer

Info: Copyright 2013 Faith Words

Where acquired: Checked out of public library.

Why:  I heard someone say that we Christians tend to give those who do not believe as we do lots of grace.  Once they become a follower of Jesus Christ, we give them much less grace and we give ourselves none.  I think this is where our misguided impression that God is angry at us comes into play.  Unfortunately, I have fallen victim to this same type of thinking.  Meyer usually writes in a way that seems to reflect just what I'm thinking and why I am thinking it.  Hopefully this book will be no different.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # #

What it's about:  I'm sure we've all heard red-faced preaching about the wrath of God.  What is God's wrath and to whom is it directed?  Is He a loving Daddy with rules that guide us on the path of righteousness and fellowship with Him?  Or, is He an angry Father ready to crush and punish any hint of disobedience?  How do we untangle what the Bible says from what our own minds believe or what we've been taught?  Meyer strives to untangle the mystery. She says,

The single most important goal of this book is to unburden you of the baggage you have carried into your relationship with the Lord--hurt, bad teachings, flawed views of a father, a works-based faith, wrong fear of God and other things that are heavy items of baggage that steal our joy. - p. 116

Favorite Quotes: 

"...when I believe that God is angry with me because of my imperfections, no matter how much He loves me and wants to forgive and restore me, I will not receive it because I don’t believe it." - p. 9

"I believed that God loved me in some sort of general, impersonal way, but I did not know the fierce, fiery, all consuming love that God has for His children." - p. 11

"Many new covenant believers still live under the old covenant, or they mix the old with the new.  They have some grace and some law, but in reality they have neither one." - p. 179

"Grace is God's power available to you free of charge, enabling you to do with ease what you could not do on your own with any amount of struggle and effort." - p. 193

"...you don't have to sacrifice your future in order to pay for your past." - p. 196

What I Liked:

• The message of the book is balanced.  Meyer doesn't preach a happy-go-lucky, floating on a glory cloud, life is easy message--what we call "greasy grace."  She mentions issues and struggles and the fact that this life isn't easy, but she also makes it clear that establishing a proper relationship with God is the foundation of dealing with life.

What I didn’t like: 

• I understand that no one book, except the Bible, can answer everything, but while this book answered a lot of questions, it left some of mine unanswered.

To sum up:  My main takeaway from this book:  God is not mad at me.  My longing to please Him should be out of a heart of worship, honor, and love, not out of being terrified of retribution for failure.  I still have a long way to go.

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 09 [101 in 1001]

Book: Seeking the Heart of God:  Reflections on Prayer.

Author: Mother Teresa and Brother Roger

Info: Copyright 1991 Harper San Francisco

Where acquired: Purchased at public library book sale.

Why:  I've never had the privilege of reading any of Mother Teresa's books.  I saw this one at the book sale and took the opportunity to buy it  very inexpensively.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # 1/2

What it's about:  The authors share reflections on their own prayer times and encourage others of the benefits of prayer.

Favorite Quotes: 

"Your faith does not create God, and your doubts cannot banish Him to nothingness." - p. 17

"Living intensely each present day means letting Christ dwell in you.  His words are so clear:  "Today, I would like to enter your home." - p. 23

What I Liked:

• The chapters did not read like an instruction manual, but as glowing homilies straight from the hearts of the authors. 
• The chapters were short, but packed with plenty to ponder.

What I didn’t like: 

• Though I like the fact that the chapters were short, the book itself ended too quickly.  I was hungry for more at the end.
• The authors quoted a lot of Scripture, but there were no references given as to what passage they were referencing.  If a person not familiar with the Bible were reading this, he wouldn't know that these quotes were even from the Bible.

To sum up:  Prayer is a wonderful communion with God that helps us to serve Him better.

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 08 [101 in 1001]

Book: White Chocolate Moments.

Author: Lori Wick

Info: Copyright 2007 Harvest House Publishers.

Where acquired: Checked out of public library.

Why:  I've read several of Wick's novels.  I was browsing the library's online catalog and noticed a title I'd never seen before.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # #

What it's about:  After losing her parents in an accident and being rejected by her grandfather, Arcineh Bryant goes on a quest for identity.  Her search leads her to true love and her real identity.

Favorite Quotes: 

Not really a quote, but one scene cracked me up.  A character went on a bike ride and wouldn't speak up when it went on too long.  The next few days, she was so sore, she couldn't move or walk.  I feel her pain.

What I Liked:

• This book didn't start out with happy go lucky Christians who floated on glory clouds all day.  These characters were not godly people, their hurts were real, and the struggles were familiarly genuine.
• Arcineh wasn't a waif waiting for the rescue of a man.  She was a strong character who had more than beauty as an asset.
• The Christian aspects of this book were solid and didn't seem to be thrown in as an afterthought.  They flowed beautifully with the story.

What I didn’t like: 

• Quite frankly, I would have dropped Arcineh's cousin off the top of tallest building and repented later.  When you read it, you'll know what I'm talking about.
• There were a few minor timeline differences and awkward sentences that were confusing.

To sum up:  My main takeaway from this book:  Arcineh's story is unique, yet it could represent anyone's quest for significance in this world.  I would highly recommend this book.

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 07 [101 in 1001]

Book: The Diva Principle.

Author: Michelle McKinney Hammond

Info: Copyright 2004 Harvest House Publishers

Where acquired: Checked out of public library's electronic books section.

Availability: amazon.com for purchase.   

Why:  When I hear the term "Diva," think of a lady with the proper swag factor.  I've always been short on swag and was hoping for some help from this tome.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  #

What it's about:  Hammond presents biblical examples of "Diva-tude" and gives some Diva dos and don'ts with prayer and devotional guides.

Favorite Quotes:  Note, the Kindle Edition does not contain real page numbers, so I'm merely citing the quotes.

You will never be able to see yourself clearly through your own eyes—your “knows” is in the way. Get it? The things you think you already know about yourself stop you from getting a new perspective on your situation.

“Go where you are celebrated, not tolerated.” - Mike Murdoch

A selfish or insecure woman makes others dependent on her strength so she will be important to them. This renders the others powerless, stunts their growth, and in the end completely paralyzes them.

What I Liked:

• I liked the general idea of the book, but the author never took it anywhere.  It's a one size fits all in a world where one size does not fit all.  Nice try, sis.

What I didn’t like: 

• This was my first go at reading a Kindle book.  I didn't know that not all of them had access to real page numbers.  Bummer.  A real pain when trying to quote from it.  "Position 1746" doesn't help me.
• There is really nothing of the author in the book.  She gives no personal application of the principles she suggested.  The advice was OK, but let's see how it worked in your life, sister.  It's kind of like recommending a diet plan, but giving us no before and after photos.
• I know I gripe about authors explaining too much at the beginning of a book, but this author does not explain enough.  I wish she had explained what the different sections meant and what the reader is supposed to do with them.
• All of her examples were women who's "Diva-tude" was in the context of their relationship with men.  In other words, they were all married or in relationship.  Even the mention of Lydia (Dorcas) was punctuated that she "may have been widowed," as if to say she couldn't possibly be a diva without having had a man.
• She is pro "Helpless Female Syndrome," as we call it in our family.  In other words, she believes it's perfectly fine for a woman to "need rescue" from someone, preferable a man--or at least act like she's helpless to get it.  That kind of weak, limp wristed thinking is what has the church society believing that a single woman above the age of 18 is useless and not worthy of honor because she is not "completed" by a man. 
• Recipes?  Really?

To sum up:  My main takeaway from this book:  Her summation of the story of Ester pretty much sums up what the main point of the book was, "She mastered the art of being beautiful and getting a man’s attention."  No thanks. 

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 06 [101 in 1001]

Book: Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World .

Author: Joanna Weaver

Info: Copyright 2000 (2003 Large Print edition by Thorndike Press) 

Where acquired: Checked out of public library.

Availability: amazon.com 

Why:  The balance between fellowship with God and service for God to others can be thrown off quite easily in this fast-paced society.  Pressures to do and be all that others wanted were choking out my desire to bask in the Savior's presence and wait on His direction.  My hope was that this book would help me change that.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # #

What it's about:  The author uses the New Testament account of two sisters, Martha and Mary, as a representation of the dichotomy many women face between worshiping God and service for God (men do too, but this book was aimed at women).  She attempts to bring life back into balance by showing the reader that if worship comes first, more effective service will follow.  Weaver uses personal experience, the quotes and experiences of various authors, and scriptural wisdom to paint a balanced picture of the Martha/Mary life.

Favorite Quotes: 

How I wish I would have learned earlier in ministry to wait upon the Lord.  Much of my energy and joy has been swallowed up by jobs and obligations that were not my own.  I still tend to rush in, presuming to know his will rather than waiting to hear what he desires.

It is a costly mistake, for often, when the Holy Spirit does ask something of me, I'm either knee deep in another project or too exhausted from my latest exercise in futility to do what God wants of me.  - p 124

-----

Jesus wasn't concerned about Martha's external abilities at all.  It was her internal disabilities that he probed--the dark corners of pride and prejudice, the spiritual handicap of busyness that left her unable to enjoy the intimacy of his presence.

After all, intimacy can be threatening.  Getting close to Jesus means we can no longer hide our inadequacies.  His light illuminates everything that is wrong and ugly about our lives.  Unconsciously, therefore, we may flee God's presence rather than pursue it.  And Satan spurs on our retreat by telling us we're not good enough to earn God's favor.  He tells us that when we get our act together--that's when we can enter the Living Room.

But the truth is, we can't get our spiritual act together unless we go to the Living Room first. - p. 126 

We are not pawns on some celestial chessboard, expendable and unimportant.  We are cherished and highly loved. - p 249

It takes a process to make a product. - 386

What I Liked:

• The author recommends many outside resources for further study. 
• There is an intensive Bible study in the back of the book for deeper insight.
• Weaver not only uses vivid example and thought provoking quotes from others, but is open about her own life.  I like an author who has lived it rather than making it a wonderful theory.
• The bibliography and cited sources have added many wonderful titles to my reading list.

What I didn’t like: 

• I read the large print edition because it was the only one available from the library. Like most people, I can normally read large print faster than standard print.  However, this author uses asides or emphasis boxes that the editor did not place them very well.  They were often placed in the middle of a paragraph.  I know, it's nitpicky, but it was also distracting.
• Some of the Bible study questions weren't clear.  I wasn't sure what was being asked.  Most of the questions were personal insight questions that didn't have a definite right or wrong answer, but the ones that did weren't very clear.
• Another nitpicky thing that bothered me:  usually books with Bible quotes annotate which version is used at the beginning of the book--usually around the table of contents.  This is the first one I ever saw it placed at the very back of a book.

To sum up:  My main takeaway from this book:

I am not defined by what I do, but who I am.  Service to God is a pleasure when fellowship with God is first place. 

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 05 [101 in 1001]

Book: Running Within .

Author: Jerry Lynch & Warren Scott

Info: Copyright 1999 Human Kinetics

Where acquired: Public Library book sale.

Availability: amazon.com and www.humankinetics.com

Why:  I am a struggling beginning runner and needed some pointers.  I saw this book at the library book sale and it looked interesting.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # #

What it's about:  The purpose of the book is to help runners transcend self-imposed mental barriers and attitudes that preclude advancing in the quest for improving their physical running game.

Favorite Quotes: 

"Remember, within the rose at all times is its full potential.  It is constantly in the process of change and growth as it comes into its own.  When we give it water, sun, and nourishment, it blossoms fully.  Like this flower, you are a natural unfolding athlete.  Nurture yourself with encouragement and positive affirmations (avoiding the messages that kill your spirit).  You have all that you need is within you now to become all that you can be.  Simply notice it and affirm it to be so." - p. 47

What I Liked:

• I realize that I approach life through a different mindset and spiritual conviction than the authors.  Though I do not agree with the sources of some of the information contained in the book, the concepts are sound.   Well, OK, until the last couple of chapters.  Visualization and affirmation are key ingredients to a successful mental running game.  I needed that since I go into most races with a sense of defeat.  That mentality adds undue stress and sucks all the fun out of a race.

What I didn’t like: 

• I can't stand it when an author takes a preface, the introduction and several chapters to tell us what the book is about, or what it's going to do for me.  Sounds like a used car salesman who's hiding something.  The authors fiddle fart around too much at the beginning of the book.  Just get to it, will you?  This prolonged faux suspense does not make me want to keep reading; it makes me want to throw the book across the room and hop on YouTube.
• Once the authors do get to the point, they repeat themselves a lot.  (Can you say ad nauseam boys and girls?  I knew you could.)  It's as if one author didn't know what the other was writing.  How many times can you say "stress and pressure can lead to injury and burnout" and "don't think like a loser"?  We get it.
• They never really address the body the way I expected.  The repetitive harping on the mind buries the physical aspects of running.  After 13 chapters on the mind, I was hoping the last five might address the body itself.  But, nope.  This made the book very hard to finish.  Honestly, I skimmed through the last couple of chapters.
• It may be that this book isn't for a beginner like me; it may be for a more advanced runner who knows the physical basics and needs the mind connection.  That's not on them; that's on me.
• Caption your photos, dudes.  I don't know who these people are or what they have to do with what I'm reading.

To sum up: My main takeaway from the book was this:

Keep running; just don't kill yourself doing it.  Oh yeah, and think positive.

Want to join the challenge?  Click the empty shelf photo on the right to learn more.  It's not too late!

#59 Empty Shelf Challenge 04 [101 in 1001]

Book: So Long, Insecurity. You've Been a Bad Friend to Us .

Author: Beth Moore

Info: Copyright 2010:  Carol Stream, IL:  Tyndale House Publishers

Where acquired: Checked out of public library.

Why:  Chronic insecurity is one of the results of  being unhealthy and overweight.  I actually saw this book at the library while I was looking for something else.  I already knew that Beth Moore was a solid Bible teacher, so I trusted that the book would do exactly what it set out to do:  be a practical Biblical guide to dealing with insecurity.

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  # # # #

What it's about:  Moore deconstructs insecurity into it's basic elements:  the whats and whys of insecurity.  This book is part autobiography, part Gallup poll, part psychological lecture, and part campmeeting.  Her focus in on women, though she does garner information from men as well and addresses some of their insecurities along the way.  This is not a self-help book, but quite the opposite.

Favorite Quotes: 

For fear of quoting the whole book, I'll restrict myself to three or four quotes.

"I don't think that any male in my life would claim that I harbor repressed anger at his gender.  (And if he did, I have a mind to hit him square in the middle of his forehead with a slingshot and a bottle of Midol.)"  - p. 6

"At the root of chronic insecurity is often the primal fear that no one will take care of us."  - p. 65

"Truth is the first casualty in a media-crazed society" - Dr. Rick Rigsby p. 97

"Insecurities do not attract.  They repel.  Insecurities do not invite intimacy.  They invite uncertainty. They do not work for us on any level at all, except to open our hearts and minds to the healing, securing strength of Christ.  Through Him we have acquired the human unction upon which every life pivots; the power to choose." - p. 238

What I Liked:

• I am drawn to authors whose messages come from practical experience.  If I didn't know any better, I'd swear this woman lived in my house and wrote this book about me.  It's written in a conversational style, rather than in condescending, "I've got it all together so what's wrong with you?" clinical psychobabble.
• Unlike other books I've read, Moore doesn't simply say "here's the problem, now get over it."  She conveys great sympathy and empathy for both men and women dealing with insecurity.  But she doesn't leave us there.  She goes on to present the cure, which is not an instant one, but an exercise in persistent recovery strategies.
• This book was good enough for me to pay library late fees to finish it.  I'm cheap thrifty, so that says something.

What I didn’t like: 

• Not really a dislike, but maybe a nit-picking.  When she first mentions that she surveyed men for their opinions on insecurity, she says that she didn't require them to give their ages, yet all through relaying their comments, she gave their ages.  So, I guess she meant that the question was optional?  Just confused wording, but it just niggled at me as I read.

To sum up: My main takeaway from the book was this:  God says in Proverbs 31:25 says that He clothes women in strength and dignity.  I better learn how to put my clothes on!

 

 

Update (2017):  I have now purchased a copy of this volume for my personal library.

Update (2019):  I reread this volume.  It was just as good as the first read, though I had a few more critical points for it.