Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Titters from the Twitter (and Other Places): December 2013

It's no secret that I love to laugh and make others pee in their pants with hilarity (or at least not look at me like I'm stupid when I crack a joke).  The internet has given me a plethora of material; from quotes, to videos, to tweets and Facebook posts.  I stole borrowed the idea for sharing them from Can I Get Another Bottle of Whine.  So, please enjoy my top titters from the Twitter (& other places) for December 2013:
  • 12-02 - From Twitter:  @bgrhubarb retweeted: 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Embedded image permalink
  •  From YouTube and Twitter from @SouthernWomen
 
  • From Guyism.com: If you know anything about American football, you'll know why the "Rudy" poster is hilarious.
  • 12/05 - From Facebook:  D.Raulerson said:  "FYI - This month is National Month Awareness Month."
  • 12/06 - From Facebook:  D.Raulerson said:  "Hey Blockbuster, remember when I said you'd never get that $5 late fee? I win."
  • 12/06 - From Twitter:   @bgrhubarb retweeted:  Think of a number. Double it. Add eight. Half it. Minus the number you started with. Close your eyes.... It's dark, isn't it?
  • 12/06 - From Facebook:  S.Maddox posted:  "You do realize that if you post something to Facebook or Twitter directed at someone not on Facebook or Twitter, they can't read it, right????  #AuntiesRandomThoughts"
  • 12/06 - From Twitter:  @bobsaget tweeted:  "Stop and smell the roses today. My dog just peed on them."
  • 12/09 - From Facebook:  D.Raulerson posted:  "I read that India recently launched a rocket to Mars. That seems like an odd place to put a call center."
  • 12/09 - From Twitter:  @HonestToddler tweeted:  "Watching TLC. A man got too big and had to be cut out of his house. That happened to my friend but they called it a C-section."
  • 12/09 - From Pinterest:  K.Hall pinned:This is just flat out funny
  • 12/11 - From Jon Acuff's website;  An open letter to the "Elf on a Shelf" people.  http://stuffchristianslike.net/2013/12/11/dear-perfect-elf-shelf-people-open-letter
  • 12/12 - From Twitter:  @honesttoddler tweeted:  "So Mr. Rogers disappears, jungle cat Daniel Tiger shows up wearing HIS EXACT SWEATER AND SHOES & nobody suspects anything?!"
  • 12/13 - From Twitter:  @honesttoddler tweeted:  "You want to see an adult cry real tears, spill their coffee."
  • 12/15 - From Twitter:  @BeckGAC_RSA tweeted: "Why can't us girls just receive a text message once a month that says 'You're Not Pregnant. Have A Nice Day'?"
  • 12/17 - From Facebook:  T.Kingston shared:
  •  12/18 - From Facebook:  T. Kingston shared:  Saw this on Twitter: "Airplanes have now banned tweezers. Anyone who can hijack a plane with tweezers deserves the plane." 
  • 12/20 - From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 tweeted:  "I'm my MeeMee wasn't the one who gave me my Christmas clock, I'd shoot it right now. "
  • 12/21 - From Twitter:  @karenlaw6 tweeted:  "20 years ago, we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we got no cash, no hope and no jobs. We must protect Kevin Bacon, 'Merica."
  • 12/21 - From YouTube video I was watching that day...yeah I know it's cheating...so what?:  "Plethora is a Latin word, it means [butt]load." - Craig Ferguson
  • 12/22 - From Twitter:  @HonestToddler tweeted:  "So it's wrong to eat out of the trash unless it's a wastebasket with three kinds of popcorn?"
  • 12/22 - From Twitter:  @JonAcuff tweeted:  "Dear husbands, have you thanked your wife yet today that she's not as shallow as the wives in jewelry commercials?"
  • 12/23 - From stuffchristianslike.net:  J.Ruhs commented: "Rudolph should have told Santa, 'No. If my nose wasn’t good enough for good weather, light your own freakin’ sleigh.'”
  • 12/23 - From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 tweeted:  "You know what the song Christmas Shoes needs?  More cowbell!"
  • 12/27 - From Twitter:  @JonAcuff tweeted:  "'I'm starving! I need pie!' My 10yo daughter doing a classic bit of 'Dessert Misdirection.'"
  • 12/28 - From Blogger: http://iron-diva.blogspot.com/2013/12/you-aint-done-nothin-if.html
  • 12/29 - From Twitter:  @TastyTuneTweets tweeted:  Haha- "That's funny" Hahaha- "That's REALLY funny!" Hahahahaha- "I'VE GONE INSANE" Bahahahahaha- "I'VE GONE INSANE AND I'M A SHEEP"
  • 12/30 - From Twitter:  @JonAcuff tweeted:  I wish I had the sales skills of the person who keeps getting the show "Finding Bigfoot" renewed for another season.
  • 12/31 - From Twitter @JonAcuff tweeted:  "If Dante could do it all over, he'd add the returns line after Christmas at Walmart to his Inferno."

Saturday, December 28, 2013

You Ain't Done Nothin' if...

In the spirit of Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a redneck if..." I've come up with a few indicators of whether we're serious about this fitness thing or not.  Caution, sense of humor required; please put on big girl/boy panties now.
  • If you've never nearly, or really, upchucked during a workout...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never broken a wire in your bra while jogging...you ain't done nothin'!  (You too, ladies)
  • If you've done what you considered a hard workout and didn't burp, fart or have to pee at some point in it...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never suffered the embarrassment of being lapped by a senior citizen at a 5k...you ain't done nothin'!  True story, I almost got beaten in a 5k race  by an 89 year old man...twice!  You go, Paw-Paw!
  • If you've never done Zumba and cried...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never done the Fred Sanford walk after getting off a bicycle...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never eaten enough fiber to disrupt a workout (if you know what I mean)...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never gotten off an elliptical machine and wondered if you would ever bear children...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never fallen asleep in your sweaty, stinky workout clothes...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never caught a cramp in a place you didn't even know you had muscles...you ain't done nothin'!  (Toe cramp, anyone?)
  • If you think that "eating more from the rainbow" requires a bag of Skittles or M&M's...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never been too tired to eat...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you think a 5k is a bra size...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you've never passed a rack of awesome pumps in favor of the New Balance rack at the shoe store... you ain't done nothin'!  (You too, ladies)
  • If you've never peed on yourself trying to do a plank...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you interchange the terms "5k" and "marathon"...you ain't done nothin'!
  • If you're insulted by getting fitness gear for birthdays, anniversaries, or Christmas...you ain't done nothin'!
  • Add your own here.

Auntie vs. the Bicycle: Round 3

The first outdoor ride.
As you will recall in round two, I finally found a way to ride my bicycle indoors.  Indoor training is fine, but the awesome fall we had here in Alabama, plus the warm days that are always sprinkled within a Southern winter made me long to find a way to get out on the Chief Ladiga Trail. (As you learned in round one, biking on the fair streets of JackVegas is OUT.)  I searched for a bike hitch but the closest I could find fit a Honda Civic, but not a Honda Accord.  WTC?  As I continue the search, I must remind myself that a bike hitch is still much cheaper than a pickup truck.

Enter, stage right, my friend Tamara.  She and a few of us from Sav-A-Life were taking a walk together when a conversation about bicycling commenced.  Our other friend --I'll not throw Mikki under the bus by mentioning her name :) -- said she was afraid of the tushy pain of bike riding (wuss weenie).  Well, Tamara said she had no such qualms, plus she had a pickup truck WITH a bike hitch.  Hallalujah!  So, we set up a time to get together and ride.

Park in Weaver
I honestly don't remember how far we biked the first time, but I was immediately hooked and was hungry for more.  Finally, something GOOD to be addicted to.  I do remember that I kept asking Tamara if she was being nice by biking more slowly to help me keep up with her--I believe my exact words were "Are you messing with me?"  She said no, but I didn't believe her until we were headed back and I took off like a shot and left her in the dust--thus her nickname for me; Rabbit.  I didn't mean to, but it was so exhilarating seeing all my indoor training turn into real road miles.  Just as a side note:  in all of my indoor training I had no way of knowing how far I was riding, just how long.  A bike computer/odometer is on my wish list.

Early in November, Tamara's husband, Scot, their son, Jonathan, and their two crazy dogs, Bear and Lexy joined our bike team and we upped our degree of difficulty.  I was kind of scared that failure was coming because I felt like my other rides were adrenaline infused and the excitement drove the distance; not strength or fitness level.  However, that was not the case.  A few times we rode to the park in Weaver and back (about 10.5 miles).  We did an 11 mile ride heading north towards Piedmont, which passes by Germania Springs Park in Jacksonville.  I swear that ride is uphill both ways--and there wasn't even any snow!  The topper was riding from our community center--our normal starting point--all the way to the Alabama end of the trail in Anniston (12 miles round trip). To ride all that way made me feel accomplished, like a real athlete.  Now, when I climbed off the bike I was an athlete with a sore butt doing the Fred Sanford walk, but still an athlete.

Now that Scottish winter has set in here in 'Bama (Alba Gu Brath, y'all), I will have to be content with my one woman, '80's music spinning parties with an occasional outdoor trek.  I can't wait for spring!  Who knows?  When I can finally get a bike hitch (or a pickup truck) and more training, I may ride the length of the entire trail (about 33 miles).  Just be prepared to come get me; that will probably be a one way trip.

Auntie: 3, Bicycle: 0  HAZZAH!

Cue the music after I get off the bike.

Friday, December 27, 2013

Auntie's Rules of Fitness: Part 3

For rules 1-8, click here.

For rules 9-15, click here.
  • Mind your business.
  • Don't be bouge.  I was recently ostracized by an online runners group because I did most of my running on a treadmill.  Someone gave me the turned up nose response of "Well, I NEVER use a treadmill."  (roll eyes here) So, I guess according to them I'm not a "real" runner unless all my miles are on the highway.  No, I'm a real runner because I RUN--even if it is a paw-paw slow pace.  I don't need shin splints, bruises from car bumpers, and large orthopaedic  clinic bills to prove I'm a runner.  Some people's children.
  • Drink plenty of water, but don't guzzle water during a workout.  If you drink too much too fast during an intense workout, will either barf or go through the workout wishing you could.
  • Have a piece of "progress" wear.  When it fits, get another one.
  • From Pinterest:  Do not reward yourself with food; you are not a dog.
  • Do not graze; you are not a cow.
  • If you eat something not on your plan, or if you, like me, lose your mind and flat out binge, do not punish yourself the next day or try to make up for what you did by trying to starve yourself or use anything to try to purge the "bad" food from your system.  Instead, focus on nourishing yourself totally.  Nourish your body with good food; nourish your mind with good words; nourish your spirit with what builds you up.  Just like in your spiritual life, grace works better than law and punishment.  Law and punishment makes you want to keep doing it.  Grace gives you the freedom to say no.
  • Be inspired, not required - What I mean by that is, be inspired by whatever floats your boat, but don't feel like you have to get the same results in the same way.  For example, I enjoy watching The Biggest Loser and Extreme Weight Loss  However, I cannot expect to lose 7-10 pounds a week without exercising being all I do. 

Monday, December 23, 2013

Christmas Got Run Over by a Reindeer: The Simple Woman's Daybook for Monday, December 23, 2013

If you would like to join in and post your own Daybook, please head on over to visit Peggy at The Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window …  cold and dreary, but on the upside, it's not raining.

I am thinking...  about whether my goal should be to survive Christmas or ignore it. 

I am thankful...
for the true meaning of Christmas.

In the kitchen...
  nothing in particular tonight. 

I am wearing...
Red shirt and black pants.

I am creating...
today, blog posts.

I am going...  nowhere tonight.
 
I am wondering... why people think that a good husband, as well as a good job, are things I can simply pull out of my butt?   YANK!  Ah, still nothing, not even a butt.  Dang!

I am reading...
Listening to one of my favorite Christmas books, Shepherd's Abiding by Jan Karon.  I love the Father Tim / Mitford books.

I am hoping... for a good Christmas and all that means.

I am looking forward to...
 new possibilities.

I am learning
… that heat pumps are a crappy invention.  They blow cold air when you need warm air.  Granted, mine is old and our landlords are replacing them, but still...
 
Around the house... stuff I need to do, but really don't feel like it.  It's not hurting anyone that they're not being done, so it doesn't matter.

I am pondering...   on how to do everything right so that success will come my way.  I guess that's how it works.

A favorite quote for today... "You know what the song Christmas Shoes needs? More Cowbell!" - Me

One of my favorite things... Hobby Lobby.  'Nuf said.

A few plans for the rest of the week:  Christmas Eve service tomorrow night. Not so sure about the rest of the week, except for Celebrate Recovery on Friday.

A peek into my day...  pictures from playing at the Calhoun County Community Band Christmas concert.  Thanks to my friend, Regina, for taking these.  The biggest honor in this is that I got to play along side the man who taught me to play snare drum, my high school band director, Mr. Smith.

 



Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Starlight Mints: The Weekly Hodgepodge

Shout out to From This Side of the Pond for the Hodgepodge questions.


Do you believe in miracles?
Of course!  God works miracles every day.
What's a recent fad you admit to trying?
Zumba.
Peppermint-are you a fan? If so, what's your favorite food or beverage containing peppermint?
Candy canes and starlight mints.  That's about all.
Break the ice, on thin ice, as cold as ice (emotionally, not literally)...which phrase have you run into most recently? Explain.
I'm breaking the ice and attempting to make new friends.  I've run into cold as ice also.  There are a few people at church who still don't know what to make of me.  Things like manners and courtesy get pushed to the side in favor of lemon pucker stares  Oh well.  It's their loss.
Have you ever broken or spilled something in someone else's home? Still friends?
Sure, name me someone who's never spilled food or drinks at someone's house.  Of course we're still friends.  If they're so hoity-toity that they cease to be my friend because I spilled water at dinner, I don't need them as a friend anyway.  I don't like any relationship that involves walking on eggshells.
'Tis the week before Christmas...are you feeling more like Buddy the Elf or the Grinch before his heart grew?
I don't know who Buddy the Elf is, but I'm not quite the Grinch either.  Like I said last week, I love Who Christmas is about and what Christmas is about.  I'm just not able to do what I want and need to do about Christmas.  So, in that I am NOT the Grinch who didn't want anyone to have a good Christmas.  I just would like to have one myself.
Share a favorite quote relating to Christmas.
THIS!

Insert your own random thought here.
Never heard "The 12 Days of Christmas" like this, have you?  From the Rick and Bubba show:
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/29899706/121808%20-%20Adler%20%26%20Friends%2012%20Days%20of%20Christmas.mp3

Friday, December 13, 2013

Boogie Shoes: The Simple Woman's Daybook for Friday, December 13, 2013

If you would like to join in and post your own Daybook, please head on over to visit Peggy at The Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window … cool cloudy night.  I'm glad Pelham Range has finally stopped booming. 

I am thinking...  about Christmas. 

I am thankful...
for a great week.  Hoping for another one.

In the kitchen...
  nothing; it's late.  I just hope I can stay awake long enough to get this post written....zzzzzz....oh, dang!

I am wearing...
bedclothes.

I am creating...
paintings and Christmas ornaments.  I've still got my heart set on creating some hand painted Christmas cards, but not sure yet.
 
I am going... Tomorrow, I am going to the botanical gardens at the Anniston Museum of Natural History to play with the Community Band.  Sunday is our Christmas musical, and I'm so excited about it...which is amazing because I'm singing instead of playing like I did in the Easter musical.  Hmm...wonders never cease.

I am wondering... about what I'm going to do for Christmas.  I knew exactly what I wanted to do for Thanksgiving, but Christmas day activities haven't come to me yet.  I may go see my Catholic friends and attend Christmas morning mass. This year, our church is again having a Christmas Eve service, and I am so loving that.  Call me old fashioned, but I've always thought the Christmas was a time for the church family to meet more, not less.
 
I am reading... I've found some readings for Advent online.  I'm also reading The Ultimate Weight Solution by Dr. Philip McGraw.  A friend and I were supposed to read Made to Crave together, but I haven't heard from her, so I'll put reading that one again on hold until the first of the year.
 
I am hoping... that all the job applications I've been turning in bring positive results. 

I am looking forward to... a new year that is much better than the last few I've had.

I am learning
… what aging gracefully looks like.  Tonight, I did something different.  Normally I go to WWF (Wild Worship Fridays) at Celebrate Recovery, but I was invited to our local Senior Citizen's Center's Christmas party/dance.  No, I haven't aged 25 years overnight; I help them with the door prizes for their monthly dance.  There were 60 year old partygoers and some nearly 90 year old participants.  No one was stolidly sitting on the sidelines.  Those who didn't have the mobility to dance were very sociable and talkative.  Those who could dance threw themselves wholeheartedly into it.  There were no curmudgeons in this crowd.  In fact, I was the worst dancer there (well duh!).  The live band, comprised of older gentlemen, was very lively and talented.  I'm going to have to learn to shake my groove thing better if I'm going to keep up with them next time I'm invited.

Around the house... Sleeping now...well when I get finished.  Cleaning and errands tomorrow.

I am pondering...   on goals for the new year.

A favorite quote for today... “My book on anger management would be called Shut Up! with a sequel called No, You Shut Up!" - Craig Ferguson.  Yeah, I know I've shared this one before, but I heard it again today and laughed at it all over again.  As my mom says, "This boy's crazy!"

One of my favorite things... Crock Pots.

A few plans for the rest of the week:  Errands, chores, and Community Band concert tomorrow. May hit the bike trail with my friend Tamara tomorrow if the weather's good.  Church Christmas musical Sunday.

A peek into my day...  here’s pictures of the projects I've been working on.





 

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Little Drummer Boy: The Weekly Hodgepodge

Shout out to From This Side of the Pond for the Hodgepodge questions.


Are you doing anything special to mark this season of Advent? If so please share.
My makeshift advent wreath
Last year was the first time I'd ever been a part of a church-wide Advent celebration.  This year is the first time I've attempted Advent celebrations at home.  I love the idea, but honestly don't get it yet.  I've read how this practice is a great time of joyous spiritual renewal, but I'm not feeling it.  Maybe for it to be successful, it must be a "family" thing.  Oh well.  I am enjoying reading the prophesies of the coming Messiah and the New Testament accounts of His birth.
Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen...and of course you recall, the most famous reindeer of all...so, which reindeer name best describes you this week?
None of them really.
What's worse-too quiet or too loud? Which have you had more of lately?
Too loud, definitely.  Haven't had much of either, thank goodness.
This question comes to you from Zoanna over at A Penchant for Pens-thanks Zo! When you are administratively gifted, how often do you find yourself not trusting less gifted people to do what they've committed to do?  If you are not so gifted that way, but are reliable, how do you feel when the stronger person (in that area) goes ahead and covers it before giving you a chance to come through?
I don't know if I have administrative gifts or not.  I've not been given the opportunity to find out.  Anytime I've been in a leadership type role, those who know they are such gifted overran any opportunities I had to assert myself or be a part of the decision making process.  So, I just kind of go along to get along now.  It's like this, don't tell me I'm a vital leader in your business/ organization then take away any power I would have to be a leader.
What is your most dreaded task relating to the holidays? Your most looked forward to holiday task?
I don't really have a certain task I dread.  I've been fighting the urge to dread the Christmas season all together.  I love Who Christmas is about and what Christmas is about.  The dread is about wanting to bless and share and feeling thoroughly inadequate to do so.  So, once again I say, maybe next year I'll have myself together. 
Facebook has released its list of the 'most talked about' topics of 2013.' Pope Francis took the number one spot.  Does that surprise you? He was followed by election, royal baby, typhoon, and Harlem Shake. Your thoughts? What was your most talked about topic in 2013? (Facebook, around the kitchen table, or wherever it is you talk)
I'm always suspect of these kinds of lists, especially when these topics were barely mentioned (if mentioned at all) by my Facebook friends.  Where's the Iron Bowl?  Where's all the gripes about the formatting changes made by Facebook (of course THEY are not going to mention that)?  Nah, I put no stock in it at all.
What's something you consider a necessity that others might view as a luxury?
Good athletic shoes.  If I'm going to continue in my quest for health, I have to have good shoes that have good shock absorption and protect my feet from injury.  Long live New Balance! 
Insert your own random thought here.
Little drummer boy...the way it should be played...with DRUMS.

Friday, December 6, 2013

Five Minute Friday: Reflect

Thanks to Lisa-Jo Baker at Five Minute Friday for the prompts.
 

GO!
 
When I reflect on this past year, I can't help but be disappointed.  I've made a lot of progress, but not the kind anyone can see.  My progress has been in internal things.  Not many things on my external has changed.  In the externals I still feel stuck.  I'm stuck on the notion that no one owes me anything and I can't wait for someone to give me anything, including a break.  However, how does that gel with the "no man is an island," no one is truly a self-made man, and you can't get to the top if you don't have someone propelling you up mentality.  I keep seeing all these Facebook posts and tweets about "do this, do that, and you'll succeed."  OK smart-butt, HOW does one do that?  Is it something that must be accomplished with help or must I walk the past alone.  Frustrating!
 
It's very frustrating.  I know I need to reflect on the good and the bad.  And I will in a longer, more organized blog post. 
 
I would just like the image that is reflected back at me to be the image I see of myself inside.  In the mirror, in my external life, everywhere.  I want a better reflection staring back at me.  Not one of what should have been, but one that is all that I really am and really meant to be.
 
TIME'S UP!
CRAP!
 


Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Carol of the Bells: The Weekly Hodgepodge

Shout out to From This Side of the Pond for the Hodgepodge questions.


According to Oxford Dictionaries, the 2013 word of the year is 'selfie'. Your thoughts? When did you last take a selfie? Do you post them online somewhere? Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind the lens?
The last selfie I took was actually of a shirt I was wearing.  I think selfies are O.K. I take them mainly because there's no one else around to take pictures of me during important or fun events in my life.  I would prefer that others take my picture because they tend to turn out much better than me taking them myself.

Will you send out Christmas cards this year? If so, are they ready to go? If not, are you glad or sad about leaving that tradition behind?
I want to, but I'm also so sappy that I may not.  It didn't feel right in the past when I just signed and dated the cards.  I like to write personal messages in the cards, but that may take too long, and I'll probably go through a whole box of tissues...or two.  I guess I'd better decide.
Do you trust easily?
Nope, been burned too many times.  I'm picky about who I trust with what.
Pine-cinnamon-peppermint-vanilla (as in sugar cookie)...of those listed, which one is your favorite December scent?
Vanilla (as in sugar cookie) definitely.
Did you do more talking or more listening yesterday? Was that by choice or necessity?
Neither, I was alone most of the day.
What's the last song that got stuck in your head? Sorry if it's back there now :)
Carol of the Bells.  We're practicing it for Sunday, so it needs to stay stuck in my head.  :)
Which world explorer (in the whole history of the world) would you most like to have traveled with, and why?
No one in particular.  I would just like the opportunity to travel the world and have the privilege of experiencing the sights, sounds, and cultures of different places in the United States and the world.  I even have a Pinterest board with some of the places I'd like to visit.  The list grows periodically.
Insert your own random thought here.
Had a great Thanksgiving.  I'm hoping to spread some joy during the Christmas season and stay out of the mullygrubs.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Try it Mikey: Fitness Challenege for December 2013

Ah, the holiday season.  A time for laughing, loving, giving, and ...FOOD!  It's the end of the year, we're tired, and we're about ready to throw in the towel and say, "Ah, screw it!  I'll try this health thing after the new year."  But WAIT!  Instead of quitting, maybe it's time to spice up the fitness routine.  So, this month's challenge is to try something new.


Now, I know that change isn't something we like.  Boring routine is best, until it becomes too boring and too routine.  So, come on, Mikey, try some new things this month.  Whether it's a new workout DVD or a whole new activity, try it and let me know how it goes.

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Titters from the Twitter (& Other Places): November 2013

It's no secret that I love to laugh and make others pee in their pants with hilarity (or at least not look at me like I'm stupid when I crack a joke).  The internet has given me a plethora of material; from quotes, to videos, to tweets and Facebook posts.  I stole borrowed the idea for sharing them from Can I Get Another Bottle of Whine.  So, please enjoy my top titters from the Twitter (& other places) for November 2013:
  • From Facebook:  Freda A'MajorWoman said:  "This dude just said drk skinned girls wit green contacts look like Xbox's!!!!!#DEAD" 11/01
  • From Twitter:  @CraigyFerg said:   "My youngest son just told me he wants to drive a monster truck and solve crimes. "  11/03
  • From Twitter:  @HonestToddler said:  "In my defense, you said 'clear your plate' but you never said how." 11/11
  • From Twitter:  @bgrhubarb retweeted "I think I have become so soft living in California that I was beaten up by a cookie" - Craig Ferguson 11/12
  • From Twitter - @HonestToddler said: "I feel sorry for Bert (from Sesame Street). You can tell he'd do anything to have his own place." 11/13
  • From Twitter - @JeffBryanDavis said:  "Developing a jukebox that, when approached by men in backwards ball caps and tank tops, emits nonlethal voltage, then plays something good."  11/13
  • From Twitter:  @bgrhubarb retweeted:  "If it weren't for charity solicitations I wouldn't have 60,000 return address stickers for the 3 pieces of paper mail I send each year."  11/17
  • From Facebook T. Walker shared: 11/17

  • From Twitter @bgrhubarb retweeted::  "Fun Fact: 100% of people don't know what to do with a dirty dish at someone else's house."
  • From Facebook D. Helstrom shared:  "Everyone should have kids. They're the greatest joy in the world. But they're also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they're born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you." – Ray Romano  11/18
  • From Twitter:  @FakeESPN said:  Official NFL Procedures: 1. throw flag 2. have conference 3. call vegas 4. pick up flag 5. announce no penalty
  • From Twitter:  @bgrhubarb retweeted:  "Nose still stuffy & I can't taste a lot. Now drinking coffee + milk of indeterminable best before date. Danger is my middle name." 11/22
  • From YouTube:  Ok is this cheating a bit because this video is from May, but I thought this comedian and his interview were funny.  I watched it on 11/22--does that count? It's here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBRL0msR6wo
  • From Twitter:  @LollipopTheater tweeted:  "When something goes wrong in your life, just yell, 'Plot twist!' and move on."   11/23
  • From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 (that's me BTW) tweeted:  "Most over used word on YouTube: EPIC. "  11/23
  • From Facebook:  "[During your holiday meal] if somebody says something to you about how much you're eating or 'Ooh, what happened to your diet?' PUNCH THEM IN THE THROAT." - Daniel and Kelly from FitnessBlender.com  11/26
  • From Twitter:  @DrHenryCloud tweeted:  "Tip: Thanksgiving Dinner is probably not the best venue to confront issues existing four decades. Enjoy your turkey and talk to the turkeys later."  11/27
  • From Facebook:  D.Raulerson said:  "Pop up ads are the Jehovah's Witnesses of the internet."  11/27
  • From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 tweeted:  "Definition of shell shocked - Trying to drink whole milk after drinking skim milk for almost a year."  #WhoaDude 11/27
  • From YouTube:  Iron Bowl trash talk from the Rick and Bubba Show.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0kvxZkP3zo  (had to post the link because Blogger's YouTube search engine isn't working well).
  • From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 tweeted:  Dictionary word: addlepated. The way we in the South would say it: "He ain't right."  11/28
  • From Twitter:  @MHarper   retweeted:  "Clark Kent had to call himself 'Superman' because 'CJ Mosley' was already taken."   11/29
  • From Twitter:  @sdmadd1 tweeted:  "YouTube needs to change its name to 'Commercial followed by six seconds of the video you really wanted to see.'"  #WTC #FreezeFrame  11/30