Prize Patrol: Simple Woman's Daybook

If you would like to join in and post your own Daybook, please head on over to visit Peggy at The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today:  Sunday, April 12, 2015
 

Outside my window …  Cloudy skies and cooler air.  It's been unseasonably warm and the pollen has been thick, so a cooling rain would be most welcome.

I am thinking...   about my health/recovery journey.  I have read a lot books, done many programs and Bible studies, and attended nearly seven years of Celebrate Recovery meetings and will continue to do so.  However there needs to be a drastic shift in my approach.  I'm weary of the continuous navel gazing I've been doing.  Yes, looking at my past was important to make a valuable analysis of why I continued to slowly kill myself and continued to fall into paralyzing depression.  Now, quite frankly, I'm so sick of it I could upchuck.  Yes, my childhood sucked, my teens, 20's, and 30's sucked.  However, I don't see how continuing to rehash and relive, and keep digging up all these horrors will make my present life less sucky.  I had started to do the 12-step study again, but after lesson one, my stomach lurched, and I though no, we're not going there again.  One good thing I got out of the book I suffered through this week is this; my present reactions to situations are based on past hurts and rejections.  I realize that I still need help---help to learn how to live in the now and enjoy it, not how to drudge up more crap from the past and curl up in a ball wanting to die.  I'm tired of being a rejected 6-year old in a nearly 43 year old body.  I'm tired of being defined by my pain.  I'm done will the belief that I will merely be pitied and tolerated because of my suffering rather than loved because I am beautifully lovable.

I am thankful...  for God's gift of music. 

In the kitchen...  My body is begging for veggies.  Hopefully, I'll get to the grocery store tomorrow.  If I have to eat another peanut butter sandwich, I'm going to hurl.  In all fairness, I've been too tired to cook, so I've grabbed what was quick.  I'm back to the sleeping but not resting mode that I loathe.
 

From the Workshop...

Finished up two projects this week.  The wreath above was this month's senior dance door prize.  The painting below was a door prize for the College of Nursing 5k.

 

I'm still working on the birdhouse quilt-ghan.  I've also got ideas for a couple of paintings.  Remember, my tulip painting from the last datebook is still for sale here.

 

I am reading...  Finished reading Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth.  The review is here.  Currently off the shelf:

I am looking forward to...  ultimate freedom.

I am learning…   there is no deeper prison, no more atrocious torture than fear.  And I hate it.

Around the house...  Regular chores.

 

A favorite quote for today... 

“If we are going to be ready for Jesus Christ, we have to stop being religious (that is, using religion as a higher kind of culture) and be spiritually real.” - Oswald Chambers

"Seriously. Calling a runner a jogger is like calling a police officer a mall security guard. " - Brendan Saur

One of my favorite things...  Baseball.   GO BRAVES!

A few plans for the rest of the week:   Not sure if I'm doing anything special or different.
 

A peek into my day...  

Wednesday, I got in my first outside bike ride of the year.  I was tired as all get out, but it was worth it.

Saturday, I participated in the first ever College of Nursing 5k at Jacksonville State University.  I finished in 58:39, slightly faster than the last 5k. 

Saturday night was prom night for many of my friends' high schoolers.  Sigh.  I don't know what's worse, Prom Night or Elite Weekend.  Since people are posting their little darlings photos...

This is from my senior prom.  The "gentleman" in the photo is my sister's boyfriend.  She and my Mom paid him to take me to the prom since no one had asked me.  From the picture, you can see why.  It's about as bad as the sympathy date I went on in college, but that's another story I'd like to forget.

And now for something totally different...  

 

Heard about this on Rick and Bubba.

Now, I love James Spann too, but no.  Just...no!

For the whole story, click here.

The Clorox company is in hot water for a supposed "racist" tweet that had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with race:  

http://money.cnn.com/2015/04/09/technology/clorox-emoji-tweet/index.html

Is this what our country has come to?  I hope Rick and Bubba tear this one to shreds Monday.

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From YouTube:  Steve Harvey shared:

 

 

From Twitter:  @GregBQuotes tweeted: "When you got more chins than a Chinese phone book, that's a fat neck. That's technically not a chin…that's not…that's a neck." 

 

From Twitter:  @MildlyAmused tweeted:  "We thought the future would be flying cars but it's actually arguing with a motion sensor about whether or not your hands are in the sink."

 

From YouTube:  The Southern Women Channel shared:

 

Auntie's Full Shelf Challenge 05

Book: Women, Food, and God.

Author: Geneen Roth

Info: Copyright 2010 Scribner; New York

Where acquired: Thrift store find.

Why:  Like The Daniel Plan, I though this book would be another helpful tool in my arsenal against food addiction. 

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 hashtags):  #

What it's about:  The author asserts that one's eating habits are a direct reflection of his spiritual life.  She asserts that her techniques will negate the negative effects of this connection.

Favorite Quotes: 

"No matter what we weigh, those of us who are compulsive eaters have anorexia of the soul.  We refuse to take in what sustains us.  We live lives of deprivation.  And when we can't stand it any longer, we binge.  The way we are able to accomplish all of this is by the simple act of  bolting--of leaving ourselves--hundreds of times a day." - p. 37

"At some point, it becomes about the weight.  When you can't live the rest of your life with ease, the weight itself needs to be addressed.  Not so that you can become super-model thin.  Not so that you can look like an image in your mind that has nothing to do with your body, your age, your life.  You need to address the weight because without addressing it, you don't actually live.  You schlep yourself from place to place, out of breath.  Sitting is painful.  Flying is torturous.  Going to the movies is challenging.  You become so burdened with the problem you've created that your life become small and your focus becomes narrow.  Life become about your limitations.  What you can and cannot do.  How much you can hide.  How ashamed you are of yourself.  You close down your senses, you leave the world of sounds, of color, of laughter in favor of a reality you've created yourself.  If you keep using food as a drug, if your life becomes about your weight, you miss everything that is not related to your weight problem.  You die without ever having lived."  pp. 59-60

"...the associations we have with feelings are in the past....It's that we perceive a present-day feeling through historical eyes.  Through the eyes of a child."  p. 103

What I Liked:

The one epiphany I gleaned from this volume is this.  I have grown weary with my present emotional connection with food being based on past emotions.  I'm tired of navel gazing and reliving childhood hurts over and over in the name of "recovery."  Could we please move on and learn to live in the now?  To eat in the now?

What I didn’t like: 

• The author's reference to God is a misnomer.   Roth admits at the very beginning that she doesn't believe in the God of the Bible.  Her belief is in more of a higher power--basically, a supreme being she can make out of what she wants--and sometimes that higher power is her.  Had I known this, I most likely would not have purchased the book.  It was in the Christian book section of the thrift store.  Whoever stocked the shelves may have just seen "God" in the title and assumed--just like I did. 
• It's a quick read, but it still takes her a long time to even remotely get to the point.  Although Roth makes it a point to tell the reader what's wrong with diets and deprivation, she leaves the reader quite spiritually and mentally empty with a lot of flowery maxims, but no real substance to hang onto. 
• Her "eat what you want when you're hungry and feel your feelings when you are not" approach looks good on paper, but in reality reads of resigning oneself to poor mental and physical health.  This, she calls the Guidelines, goes into a multi chapter monologue where she describes what eating her way should accomplish, but not how to go about doing it until the very last page of the book.  Apparently, Roth forgot that eating what one wants and listening to one's body is what causes excessive bodily weight gain.  Her assumptions about mental health asserts that "no one is broken," however, her method of dealing with feelings, called the Inquiry (which is never fully described), dives into that brokenness.  Her technique, plus her sentence structure shows that she is confused and wants others to be confused also.  Sorry, this has "Guru trying to sell a book but doesn't have a clue" written all over it. 
• If you're sensitive to language, you won't like this one.
• Since when is this only a female problem?

To sum up: 

Although this book has a few good points, it's not a volume I would read again.  I also wouldn't recommend it to anyone.

Hold My Beer and Watch This: The Weekly Hodgepodge

Want to join the party?  Go on over to From This Side of the Pond  for the Hodgepodge link-up!

Besides leftover Easter goodies, what's something currently kept in a basket at your house?

Nope, no leftover Easter goodies.  The Easter Bunny didn't visit me, but I do have plenty of yarn.

'The greater danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.' ~Michelangelo Buonarroti )

So which one are you...the one who aims too high, or the one who aims too low? Have you ever seen The Sistine Chapel? Did you know Michelangelo's surname prior to answering this question?

Oh, I definitely aim too low.  I think it's to try to avoid disappointment, but that's not healthy thinking.  Zig Ziglar is first person I remember saying this truth "If you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time." 

Nope, I've never seen the Sistine Chapel and for all I knew, Michelangelo's surname was "how ya doin'?"

April 7th is National Beer Day. Hmmm...wonder how that's celebrated? Do you like beer? Have a favorite? If you're not a beer drinker do you have any recipes you enjoy cooking that call for beer?

I liked beer when I was a teen, but I don't care for it now.  My favorite was plain old Budweiser.  Now, the only use I have for beer is to kill slugs when I grow tomatoes...and I haven't grown tomatoes in a coon's age.

Speaking of Beer: Famous last words of any Southern man, "Hey, hold my beer an' watch'is!" 

When did you last travel somewhere new? Tell us where? How'd it go?

Nowhere exotic or far away.  I keep telling y'all I ain't never been nowhere. 

The value of _________________________is greatly overrated.

This is going to piss off a lot of people, but my answer is motherhood. KEEP READING; DON'T ASSUME.  This is not a slam on my mother, or anyone else's mother for that matter; it is an acknowledgement that although motherhood has been presented as the only use for a woman, I am not cut out for it.  As much as I love kids and enjoyed teaching, I would make a terrible mother.  I would not submit a husband or children to my issues and damage, so for me, it's overrated.

What's a pet peeve of yours when it comes to restaurant dining?

The restaurant being so dark that I can't read the menu or see my food.  For the love of Mike, turn some lights on!

It's Poetry Month...share a favorite poem, either the title, a few lines you find meaningful, or the whole kit and caboodle.

From Whose Line is it Anyway:  Scenes from a Hat: 

Poems about embarrassing moments...

I was held up at gunpoint.

I did not know what to do.

He said, "Give me your money!"

and I made number two!

 

-Wayne Brady

First lines of the worst poems ever written...

When I was drunk

you were beautiful...

 

-Wayne Brady

Can you tell I'm not really into poetry?  To quote Craig Ferguson, "Hey, you want class?  Watch PBS!"

Insert your own random thought here.

My energy level is much better than it was last week.  I'm ready to start cycling outside (I think).  Pictures to follow.

I finished another book in my full shelf challenge.  The review is here.  It's not too late to join the challenge.

Got a sneak peek at the course for Saturday's College of Nursing 5k at Jacksonville State University today.  It's going to be a good fun race.   

I'm thinking of starting an "Auntie Dictionary."  Are there names, places, phrases, acronyms, etc. that I use in my blog that I haven't thoroughly explained?  Let me know.  If the dictionary isn't necessary, I'm not going to waste your time with it.