Sunday, April 12, 2015

Prize Patrol: Simple Woman's Daybook

If you would like to join in and post your own Daybook, please head on over to visit Peggy at The Simple Woman's Daybook

For Today:  Sunday, April 12, 2015

Outside my window …  Cloudy skies and cooler air.  It's been unseasonably warm and the pollen has been thick, so a cooling rain would be most welcome.

I am thinking...   about my health/recovery journey.  I have read a lot books, done many programs and Bible studies, and attended nearly seven years of Celebrate Recovery meetings and will continue to do so.  However there needs to be a drastic shift in my approach.  I'm weary of the continuous navel gazing I've been doing.  Yes, looking at my past was important to make a valuable analysis of why I continued to slowly kill myself and continued to fall into paralyzing depression.  Now, quite frankly, I'm so sick of it I could upchuck.  Yes, my childhood sucked, my teens, 20's, and 30's sucked.  However, I don't see how continuing to rehash and relive, and keep digging up all these horrors will make my present life less sucky.  I had started to do the 12-step study again, but after lesson one, my stomach lurched, and I though no, we're not going there again.  One good thing I got out of the book I suffered through this week is this; my present reactions to situations are based on past hurts and rejections.  I realize that I still need help---help to learn how to live in the now and enjoy it, not how to drudge up more crap from the past and curl up in a ball wanting to die.  I'm tired of being a rejected 6-year old in a nearly 43 year old body.  I'm tired of being defined by my pain.  I'm done will the belief that I will merely be pitied and tolerated because of my suffering rather than loved because I am beautifully lovable.

I am thankful...  for God's gift of music. 

In the kitchen...  My body is begging for veggies.  Hopefully, I'll get to the grocery store tomorrow.  If I have to eat another peanut butter sandwich, I'm going to hurl.  In all fairness, I've been too tired to cook, so I've grabbed what was quick.  I'm back to the sleeping but not resting mode that I loathe.
From the Workshop...

Finished up two projects this week.  The wreath above was this month's senior dance door prize.  The painting below was a door prize for the College of Nursing 5k.

I'm still working on the birdhouse quilt-ghan.  I've also got ideas for a couple of paintings.  Remember, my tulip painting from the last datebook is still for sale here.
I am reading...  Finished reading Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth.  The review is here.  Currently off the shelf:

I am looking forward to...  ultimate freedom.

I am learning
…   there is no deeper prison, no more atrocious torture than fear.  And I hate it.

Around the house...  Regular chores.
A favorite quote for today... 

“If we are going to be ready for Jesus Christ, we have to stop being religious (that is, using religion as a higher kind of culture) and be spiritually real.” - Oswald Chambers

"Seriously. Calling a runner a jogger is like calling a police officer a mall security guard. " - Brendan Saur

One of my favorite things...  Baseball.   GO BRAVES!

A few plans for the rest of the week:   Not sure if I'm doing anything special or different.
A peek into my day...  

Wednesday, I got in my first outside bike ride of the year.  I was tired as all get out, but it was worth it.

Saturday, I participated in the first ever College of Nursing 5k at Jacksonville State University.  I finished in 58:39, slightly faster than the last 5k. 

Saturday night was prom night for many of my friends' high schoolers.  Sigh.  I don't know what's worse, Prom Night or Elite Weekend.  Since people are posting their little darlings photos...

This is from my senior prom.  The "gentleman" in the photo is my sister's boyfriend.  She and my Mom paid him to take me to the prom since no one had asked me.  From the picture, you can see why.  It's about as bad as the sympathy date I went on in college, but that's another story I'd like to forget.

And now for something totally different...  

Heard about this on Rick and Bubba.
Now, I love James Spann too, but no.!
For the whole story, click here.

The Clorox company is in hot water for a supposed "racist" tweet that had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with race:

Is this what our country has come to?  I hope Rick and Bubba tear this one to shreds Monday.


From YouTube:  Steve Harvey shared:

From Twitter:  @GregBQuotes tweeted: "When you got more chins than a Chinese phone book, that's a fat neck. That's technically not a chin…that's not…that's a neck." 
From Twitter:  @MildlyAmused tweeted:  "We thought the future would be flying cars but it's actually arguing with a motion sensor about whether or not your hands are in the sink."
From YouTube:  The Southern Women Channel shared: