Book Trek 2018 - 05

Book:  Braving the Wilderness.

Author:  Brene’ Brown

Info:  Copyright 2017.  New York:  Random House

Rating (on a scale of 1-4 stars):  ✮

Where Acquired:  Library check out. 

What it's about:  Brown takes on the wilderness of loneliness, encouraging the art of what she calls “true belonging,” while encouraging others to hold true to their beliefs even if they are standing alone.  She uses research and personal stories to support her thesis.  

Favorite Quotes:

Even in the context of suffering—poverty, violence, human rights violations—not belonging in our families is still one of the most dangerous hurts.  That’s because it has the power to break our heart, our spirit, and our sense of self worth. –p. 13

Sometimes the most dangerous thing for kids is the silence that allows them to construct their own stories—stories that almost always cast them as alone and unworthy of love and belonging. –p. 15

I can confidently say that stories of pain and courage almost always include two things:  praying and cussing.  Sometimes at the exact same time. –p. 24

Unchecked loneliness fuels continued loneliness by keeping us afraid to reach out. –p. 54

Based on studies across diverse fields, [Susan] Pinker concludes that there is no substitute for in-person interactions.  They are proven to bolster our immune system, send positive hormones surging through our bloodstream and brain, and help us live longer….’In fact, neglecting to keep in close contact with people who are important to you is at least as dangerous to your health as a pack-a-day cigarette habit, hypertension, or obesity.’ –p. 140

Takeaway:

I’ve thoroughly enjoyed several of Brown’s books. They normally cause me to think and usually bring shifts in my thinking that help me live a more authentic life.  However, this volume baffled me.  First of all, it is a conglomeration of her previous works, rather than infusing anything new.  Second, it was confusing as all get out.  She talks about the dangers of loneliness (which freaked the crap out of me) and being left out, while at the same time saying that you should stand alone and not worry about belonging.  Her thesis was based on a quote by Maya Angelou:

You are only free when you realize you belong no place—you belong every place—no place at all.  The price is high.  The reward is great.

What the Sam Hill does that even mean?  

Third, it was a smattering of political correctness, while saying that one doesn’t need to be politically correct.  I was terribly disappointed with this volume.  I was hoping to find real strategies for dealing with loneliness, learning to be more authentic and free so that I can help others, rather than needing help all the time.  Instead of helping, this book was very wounding to my soul.  Instead of helping me find “true belonging,” I felt more and more isolated, lonely, and depressed.  This book read like Uninvited—if you feel lonely and left out, too bad because you’re not like me. You should feel lonely and left out.  While speaking about not labeling, dehumanizing, and marginalizing our fellow human beings, she labeled, dehumanized, and marginalized those who don’t agree with her.  While there were some great quotes in the book, I couldn’t drink the Kool-Aid of Brown’s Hippie Manifesto.