I was at the doctor's office yesterday filling out paperwork. New to the mix is a mental health questionnaire. Though there wasn't a lot of margin for answer clarity, I answered the questions as honestly as I could.
Why didn't I just answer "no" to everything?
After I had my vitals taken and got comfortable waiting for the doctor in the examination room, a nurse came in and asked me was I OK. "Sure," I said. "O...K," she said as she wagged my paperwork at me. "I'm just concerned that you're depressed."
First, a disclaimer, the questions are VERY general and don't give the patient a way to explain. Second, it's not secret that I do deal with depression, but it had been several weeks since I had any such dark thoughts. As I said, I had no way to explain that.
I had hard time not laughing at the nurse and saying the following:
So you think I'm depressed? Alrighty, you put me on a scale that weighed me SEVEN pounds heaver than my scale at home. Your blood pressure monitor took THREE tries before it displayed a reading that was MUCH higher than the one I took a few hours earlier. I've been on meds that made me sicker than if I hadn't taken them at all. You put me in a cold room with magazines from 1997 and won't let me pee. I SHOULD to be depressed!Have mercy!
Prompts provided by Mrs. Kate over at Heading Home.